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Thursday, April 24, 2008

Relax, I'm just being a bloke.

Bright Ambassador got me thinking about FHM's 100 Sexiest Women list, and sadly, I only know who 42 of the ladies in question actually are.

My top 5 would read like this:

5: Claire Forlani.
Sadly now married to the lump of wood that is Dougray Scott.
4: Jo Frost.
Supernanny can potty train me any time she likes!
3: Joanna Lumley.
She had it then and she still has it now.
2: Jane Seymour.
That's her daughter in the pic, who'd get £20 and told to get lost for a few hours.
1: Suzi Perry.
She knows about gadgets and digs bikes. Can't really top that.


If you're offended by the sexist nature of this post, then please don't come crying to me when there's a spider in the bath.

19 comments:

Steve said...

Jo Frost - yes. Jane Seymour - yes. Her daughter would be given £20 to stay and join in.

I'd also add in Rachel Weisz, Kate Winslett and Kirstie Allsop into the mix but that would be my very own personal cocktail...

Inchy said...

Not a bad mix there Steve, except for Kirstie Allsop. She's a bit 'mumsy'.

sparsely kate said...

Wow - you guys like Jo Frost? Very cool!

Now get on the naughty step and say you're sorry.

EmmaK said...

Jo Frost!!!!!! I don't get it....she's not remotely fit. I guess you just like someone treating you like a naughty boy. Is that it?

Ron, Apparently said...

I like the fact you choose to put the fit bike bird next to a Ducati. Class x2.
Personally, I like my missus. She's a top bird, fit as fuck and keeps me happy (wink, wink).

Inchy said...

Emma - Jo Frost IS fit, and she's ALL woman, baby! If she's looking for someone naughty to discipline, then I'm the baby-eating Bishop of Bath & Wells!

Ron - Dude, that is such a cop out! Was she leaning over your shoulder when you typed that!?

BPP said...

Claire Forlani is Hollywood's finest squinter. Her squinting work in 'Meet Joe Black' should have won her an Oscar.

And, Christ, I'd sell my mother to slave traders for a fortnight's worth of fun with her, wouldn't I just?

That's not sexist.

Inchy said...

BPP - I know what you mean, she usually looks like the studio lights are a bit too bright. Also her English accent in the last series of CSI:NY was awful. Almost as bad as Richard Gere's Irish accent in 'The Jackal' or Keanu Reeves brit in 'Dracula'.

Jimmy said...

or Mickey Rourke's irish accent in 'A Prayer For The Dying'....taking about ladies of a certain fitness.........I'd list up

Monica Bellucci
Laura Esposto

Together one night, i'd go 30 seconds - die happy...

just saying.....

i'll get my coat

Ron, Apparently said...

No cop out, mate. All true, an she's upstairs in bed right now.

Inchy said...

So why are you on here, ya madman?!

Inchy said...

Jimmy - Worse foreign accent in a movie performance goes to Clint Eastwood for ordering a 'second dog patrol' in Russian in the fantastic 1982 spy thriller 'Firefox'.

"You must think in Russian, Mr Gant. Do you think you can do this?"

"Can I fuck!"

PS - I'll take the other Esposito chick, Jennifer.

Jimmy said...

Inchy - good call on the Eastwood Firefox accent, "Russian my ass!"

Anyway his 'papers were not in order'.

Inchy said...

But he often wondered whether the Ruskies got "tired of fighting city hall"

Auburn haired artist said...

Yay Ron !

I like a man who will stand up for his wife ! My hubby gets it three times a day, whether he wants it or not - I tolerate no excuses around here !

Bill From Gainesville said...

HOLY cow 3 times a day? That is AWESOME!

Inchy said...

Even if I was dating the lovely Suzi Perry and she demanded it 3 times a day, I'd end up killing her or leaving her. I'm just not built for that kind of demanding schedule. Once a day maybe, really well, for maybe an hour, then drift off into a blissfull, Jo Frost filled, slumber.

Mmmmmmm . . .

Ron, Apparently said...

To be honest, I'm really not just sticking up for her for the sake of being a "good husband" she really is a top bird.

thebiglumpousky said...

A 1 hour session are you joking? If the bint isn't happy with a quick shuv until god glorious moment is upon me (after aprox 6 min 30 seconds) then leave her and find someone else who suffers from seroius low esteem and is happy that any knuckle dragger will show her some attention.