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Friday, May 02, 2008


"Hello, you're through to ******* Bank, Shamika speaking, how may I help you?"

"Hi Shamika, I've lost my bank card." (Schoolboy error, I know!)

Ok, I just need to ask you some security questions."

"Fire away."

"Ok, what's your postcode?"

"It's ******."

"Correct. What's your date of birth?"

"It's **/**/****."

"Correct. You've passed your security check."

Well there's no way that the hardened identity thief will ever foil that fortress of security! I may as well just hide all my cash and valuables in the toe of my shoe!

Listening to 'Ride' by The Vines.


Jaggy said...

Are you sure the Demon hasn't just tidied it up?

Steve said...

I always knew Ken Dodd was onto something with that matress thing...

Anonymous said...

hahah I had a good chuckle at this.

Jimmy said...

What would they say if you'd ask for a clue during the security questions?
I came across this once

Bank Person "For security purposes; what's the first letter of your mother's maiden name?"

Me "*"

Bank "that's not correct Mr Haggis"

Me "er, can you give me a clue at all then?"

Bank Person "I can't really say"

Me "urhhum"

Bank Person "Starts with an S then"

Me "mmhm that doesn't sound like my mother"

Bank Person "Four letters"

Me "that's the wrong mother I think"

Bank Person "your account ends with ***?"

Me "No its ***"

Bank Person "Oh I seem to have the wrong account in front of me"