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Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Oh My Gok!

Ladies, why do you do it?
Why continually self-flagellate yourselves on television over the way you look?

The Demon is using the pc as I type this, so I'm banished to the couch with the laptop kindly donated by the bronzed Adonis that is Mr Jaggy, where I'm confronted by the conundrum that is Gok Wan and his latest method of getting the tits of Britain out into the open, his beauty contest 'Miss Naked Beauty'.

The premise of the show seems to be that he's looking for a woman, any woman, who can represent the 'woman of today' as some sort of beauty ambassador. She'll be natural, confident, intelligent, and most importantly, she'll be different.
Our Gok, who's name means Noisy Big City incidentally, will have the girlies running and jumping through hoops in order to get them to cry on national tv using all manner of confidence sapping tricks like photographing their body part that they hate the most and then showing it to a few million viewers whist simultaneously criticising them with extreme prejudice. The bastard!

After about 5 minutes of this drivel I switched over to Dave which had Joanna Lumley on an old episode of Top Gear.

Normal service had ben resumed.

9 comments:

Zen Wizard said...

Why don't we get this, "Get Women Naked and Humiliate Them" show in the United States?

Probably something to do with the FCC. I mean, it was a national emergency when we accidentally saw a tit during the Super Bowl.

Inchy said...

That's not strictly true, Zen. You guys have George W on tv all the time and he's definitely a tit.

Steve said...

Naked women jumping through hoops. Hmm. So it wasn't all bad then?

Inchy said...

Trust me Steve, many of these women shouldn't have been jumping at all, no matter what the circumstances were.

Steve said...

Mr Inchy, you've been tagged...

Sky Clearbrook said...

I don't have any particular objection to Gok's shows, but I just get fed up hearing the words "gorgeous", "girlfriend" and "bangers" every two fucking seconds.

Roman Empress said...

He looks like something utterly awful and unwelcome from the future.

Eostre said...

Billie Piper was on Top Gear once, she had on a slightly see through top and talked about her attraction to ginger men. Despite her oddly oversized features, I find her oddly attractive. She's not your classic high class call girl but god love her for trying.

Inchy said...

I don't think Gok Wan was born, I think he was created in a lab somewhere.

As for Billie Piper, well as far as call girls go, she must be at the more affordable end of the spectrum. £50 would be my upper limit for a fumble with her unmentionables.
Nicole Scherzinger, on the other hand, well she could have all three of my credit cards any time she likes!