Fat

Now I know what you're thinking. You're thinking "She's a terrible mother! She's torturing that poor child!"

WRONG!

She should get a fucking medal. She's teaching the fat little bastard a very important lesson.
He now knows that he has to do something about his weight, or die one day climbing his obese, flaccid, turgid, disgusting, ass out of bed!

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of people who are overweight, I have no problem with that, but there are some people for whom 'overweight' was a state that they had to battle through in order to become truly gargantuan! You know these people, they never wear a seatbelt because it won't fit round them, they always claim to be happy as they are, and yet are also always "on a diet"!!!!

I have a very simple solution for all this obesity . . . . .

STOP! FUCKING! EATING!

Call me cold hearted, but when someone can sit down and eat a set-meal-for-4 all by themselves, it's time to get Brian Garrett in for a Change Presentation!